Life. What is real life these days–something seen from behind the newest Iphone screen on instagram and snapchat? Is it the rose tinted version of the life we live, or the not-always-so-pretty version of our highly filtered selfies and coffee date shots? For the longest time, my heart felt that it really was supposed to be just that–beautiful, filtered, and happy at all times. Like what I saw for all those glamorously beautiful people parading through my instagram feed. So, what was I supposed to do? I had to follow suit and make my life look that pretty. I mean, that’s real life…right?
Along came my grand awakening. It was not so glamorous–far from pretty–actually pretty darn harsh, and more along the lines of heartbreaking than anything close to happy. I had spent nearly two years working as a wardrobe stylist for what I thought was my dream luxury clothing company– and 3 years prior to that as a stylist for other companies. The job was really intense, constantly demanding, sometimes boring, and not that often fulfilling. But hey, I worked for a glamorous label that all my favorite bloggers were wearing, and I made just enough money to cover the bills and occasionally buy that on trend item I needed to photograph in for my instagram! So it was okay, I could make my life like kind of like those other people. I had some nice clothes, lived in a big city, and worked for a prestigious company. That’s all I needed to be one of them, right? That was the lie I told myself every morning when I woke up always prepared to work a 14 day straight shift in case no other employees showed up that day. Then we got a phone call, corporate management was visiting in 3 days. An unprepared visit. We all hoped and prayed this meant our store was moving to the hippest location in town that we had been begging for. It wasn’t. In one month, our store, that all of us had spent more than a year working for, would close–and we would be the people working to close it.
I don’t think I have ever been so shaken in my life. I cried–in public–like I’ve never cried before. My false sense of stability, my instagram “perfect” life was all coming crumbling down. I would now be jobless, uncool, and definitely not in any way considered glamorous. I no longer had a brand name to fall back on to make my life look special. My brain was in such state of panic over the next month or so, that it wasn’t until the day we closed the doors to our shop for the final time, that I realized…this is REAL LIFE. It’s not always pretty, it’s genuinely painful at times, but inside all of that there are these tiny moments of incredible beauty!
It wasn’t until I lost my job that I had this epiphany–I was completely missing life! I wasn’t living it anymore. I was a workaholic zombie that paraded around like I was hot stuff. All that time I completely missed what was going on around me. I completely ignored life to work this “chic” job, I had given up my creative side, I had given up my outgoing people-person side. I had given up all the things that make life a life worth living. I was so focused on being cookie-cutter-cool that I didn’t ever bother being inspired by REAL life sans-filter.
All of that craziness I went through, brought me to one, really amazing, conclusion. There are other people out there, living the life that I lived, who are also desperately in need of inspiration reminding them of how REAL life can be beautiful even through the hard stuff. There needs to be someone out there in the bloggosphere living a real life, just like everyone else, to inspire and encourage the masses. I wish I had had someone like that when I was going through all the madness, and trying so hard to make my life look pretty and happy all the time! That was when my eyes opened and I saw, I WANT TO BE THAT PERSON. I want to be able to inspire the people working their asses off day in and day out that still want to enjoy real life and feel inspired to do, create, and live in the present. I hope through this blog I can be that person for you, the person I so desperately needed. It won’t always be pretty, and I’m sure it won’t be very glamorous, but it will always be honest! So I hope you will stick around with me, and live life in the moment, and enjoy the small beautiful things, and to be encouraged when it seems like everything is going to pot!! This is my real story, my real raw life, my adventure trying to capture happiness one small moment at a time.
I hope you will join me, in embarking on my journey to live life fully, honestly, and with an open heart!